Returning, staying and leaving

The tunnel that encloses us is such a comfort. We can see a little to the left, a little to the right, some milestones up ahead and know, with some certainty, where the tunnel will lead. And we are happy with that. Our successes and failures only exist in comparison to the achievements of others, so our tunnels all run in the same general direction with the same milestones and the same final outcome.

I don't suppose anyone has followed the journey of the man who was walking from the bottom of South America to Alaska? He had to postpone his journey as he entered Colombia due to a lack of funds. He has now returned to the 'normal' life with 'normal' people and is quietly going insane. The futility of the daily motions, the fretting over luxuries, the 'sameness' of everyday and everyone. A society of narcissists who ultimately loath themselves. I can hear the optimists' rebuttal - there is uniqueness in every day and everyone, it is the responsibility of the observer to find it. Perhaps it is the repression and avoidance of uniqueness that is drilling into his head, the way more people try to fit into the mould and show surprise, shock and suspicion at those who don't.

To wake up each day with a blank canvas, but with purpose and vigour is perhaps the luxury beyond all other luxuries. A poor man on the slopes of the Andes may enjoy wonderful views, and the satisfaction of a well worked field and food in his belly, but in the end, the views become the same, the people become the same. But his work and the opportunities available to him means he won't suffer from the problem of leisure, and contemplations of success, failure and achievement (in the sense that we do in our society). He suffers from many other plights, better and worse, it depends.

So what does this man do (the traveller that is)? Keep walking, keep travelling. What does he gain? What does he lose? In a cost-benefit analysis you would assign values/weights to the implications of each decision. Not really possible when you don't know the happiness or opportunities that you might miss out on from each choice. Maybe it is his own narcissism that drives the desire to be different, and his fury at the ignorance of others to his greatness in being different. Perhaps it is his ego rather than his 'spirit' that desires 'freedom' and beauty and reality. Why else keep a blog....